Negative Nancy.

I spend 87% of my life dwelling on things that piss me off.

Probably because everything pisses me off. I don't mean for things to intentionally irritate me, but just, everything, well, does. Slow walkers, people who try to start up more conversation while I'm obviously trying to walk away, talking about the weather, unnecessary text message conversations, the fact that it seems I can't meet any other like-minded gay men in this world who don't wanna just have sex, baby talk in daily conversation, people who ask questions they can answer themselves if they just take two God forsaken seconds to look into the situation, people who don't use up the last little bit of whatever it is they're using just to avoid having to clean up the rest, people who don't clean up after themselves period, dirty dishes in the sink, obnoxious teenage girls at the mall, Tim Hortons, people who claim to be Starbucks addicts but only drink Iced Tea Lemonades and Vanilla Bean Frappucinos, people who sucked at reading in school but would ALWAYS volunteer to read aloud in class, when people take selfies and don't own up to the fact that it's a selfie and accompany it with some stupid quote or phrase, people who don't dry off in the shower, hicks, UGG boots, the fact that it's Sunday night and I'm just writing this now...

The list goes on. But I'm not going to sit here and just list a bunch of things that really irritate me. Although that would probably be a lot easier. Like... A lot easier. FML.

The fact that so many things bother me must say something about myself. There's obviously some piece of me that's missing if so many things can really cause me that much frustration. People always tell me it's a lot harder to be angry all the time than it is to try to constantly be happy. Well you obviously haven't walked in my shoes because for me to remain happy when someone asks me "Is there any milk left" as they're standing right in front of the fucking fridge is nearly impossible.

There must have been some point in my life that something happened to cause me so much negativity. It's funny because I find myself to be a very positive, happy-go-lucky and vibrant person. I think most people would agree? I hope most would agree. I guess I just bottle up a lot of the negativity inside. God, my life is one big oxymoron. Either that, or I should take up acting because I'm pretty sure I might be on the road to the Oscars and the only filmography I have under my belt is the 94829082 homemade horror flicks I made as a child. Who said ketchup was for dipping?

When it comes down to it, I think my endless pet peeves would be my biggest character flaw. It shows that I really have a hard time sweating the small stuff. If I was anyone else I probably wouldn't like me (maybe that's why it seems everyone just wants to have sex with me and not actually be friends?). I mean, you just used the milk, Cale. You know there's still at least 2 glasses full left in the fridge. It would be so so so much easier to simply respond with a vocalized "yes" rather than a never-ending thought of "oh my good God would you open up the fridge and look for your lazy-ass self just like every other person on this planet you lazy piece of shit." And if I genuinely don't know how much milk is left is it really so hard to just say "I'm not sure, you'll have to check?" YES! WHY MUST IT BE SO HARD. Sigh.

I love people, I really do. But God, they make it so easy to hate them as well.

Until next time,

xoxo, Cale
The Sassy Friend.